Awesomeness

I will soon try and write about the most awesome time I have had the last few days. But I can tell you this: I have had my first hangover ever today. A result of one of the most awesome parties I had. It was a small price to pay. Turns out my sister is very good at creating cocktails on the spot.
My last few days in Holland are turning out to be just packed full of goodness.  I'm feeling lots of love. Enjoying every second, taking it all in, and smiling lots.

Details soon.

Time & Age (or: Too fast & Too old)

Hey crew! How's your part of the world? Here it's finally warm again, except of course, that it's been raining so much with so many thunderstorms that it's not really been great for getting a tan or sitting outside with your Mac writing your blog. But you know, that's Holland and I still love the place.


I have to say that my looming departure is in many ways making me feel all melancholy and weepy. In other ways I am jumping up and down with excitement, mostly to see that gorgeous smile on my husband's face, feel his super warm cuddles and enjoy our everyday in-jokes that wouldn't make sense to anyone but us. There are many things to look forward to in Australia. One of them, of course, the weather.


I can't believe it's been nearly six months that I've been here. Time just goes so incredibly fast. Have you ever noticed that the older you get the faster it goes? Children have so much time to themselves to do whatever they want they often complain of feeling bored! Not to mention the amount of 'I'm bored, inbox me' status updates I see on my teenage friends on Facebook. I remember when I was a kid and used to tell my mum I was bored she would exclaim:"Enjoy it, child, I wish I was bored!"


That's one of the facts of life, and to quote the brilliant song Sunscreen by Baz Luhrman, "Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded." I wish I had enjoyed my youth more. I spent so much time worrying about what others thought of me that I let define me. I just wanted to be liked. Wish I had known the magic trick to being liked is liking yourself. I still find that hard sometimes. I am seriously crap at reassuring myself that I am a nice and kind person, and often let myself believe I am constantly letting people down. 


I am afraid I do not have enough emotional maturity. In truth, I wish I was still 23 physically because often that's how I feel emotionally. I do not feel like someone who is nearly 31. I like the life experience I have, and I like the life I lead as a 30 year old, but I don't feel ready for the emotional strains of this age. I don't feel ready to worry about my mother's health and ponder her mortality. I don't feel ready to lose friends to their babies. I don't feel ready to have spend 6 years living with constant renovations and a mortgage. 


I was quite late with a lot of things. I started drinking coffee at 21. I started drinking alcohol at 28. I learnt how to drive at 24. I feel like my life has only just gotten good and now I feel too old to enjoy it.  All I would now love to do is go out every night with friends and have fun. Not get drunk or behave like idiots, but just be out and enjoy life. Instead back in Australia I spent nearly every night with my husband on the couch watching tv. That's not how I want my life to be like anymore.


(By the way, the weather has just seriously turned violent, we're inside a thunder cloud right now, it is dark as night, rain is flooding our terrace, the thunder and lightning are frightening the cat, the drain in the kitchen is making gurgling noises as the rain is flooding the sewerage! I have not witnessed rain like this in ages. Amazing how there was a dry spell just as I made coffee for my mother and delivered it to her at the local shop where she volunteers!)


Since I have gotten to Holland I haven't watched any tv. I watch series online, in my own time without advertising and just the things I choose to watch. Nothing mindless or dumb. My friend Renée got rid of her tv recently. Most of her friends told her she was crazy. I told her 'good for you!' She now enjoys reading books and listening to music, or even, god forbid, have conversations with her beau! To be truthful with you I have not missed watching tv at all. I can get whatever I am interested in from the web, the news, documentaries, tv series, films. It's all there, on demand. Why put up with advertising? The only reason I used to watch so much tv is because my husband does. He can watch tv and read the paper or browse the web at the same time! 
But one of the reasons I don't need tv is because I read so much. I love to read. Books are my movies, my tv. I much rather curl up in bed or on the couch with a good book than watch tv. 


(Funny: the cat was meowing by her cat flap, as if she wanted to go out, but it 's crazy wet out there, so I opened the door for her to have a look. She quickly turned and walked away! Now she's just gone out through her flap and ran under the cover over our terrace where she's walked around, looking grumpy because it's flooded and wet there, too. She's now back inside complaining loudly, and jumped up on the chair behind me demanding cuddles. She's all wet. Silly cat! Though the storm seems to have passed.)


My husband doesn't, and many other people don't, enjoy reading as much as I do. Some people find it hard work, it's not relaxing for them. But watching tv requires little physical or mental effort, and a lot of people find it relaxing. To me, it's the opposite. Stupid tv and ridiculous advertising totally wind me up, I often yell at the tv. Who says that smooth and shiny hair is healthy hair, for example? Surely that is not the natural state of human hair? How many chemicals are in a product like Pantene that we don't need to clean our hair, but is in there just to make it shiny? Most advertising is lies anyway. Washing your hair with Pantene is only going to make it look like in the ads if you had your hair styled at a salon every day. 
See how tv is not good for my brain? I waste so much time getting riled up over things that really never need to be worried over. Like shampoo ads.


So, I would rather go to lots of dance classes, and go out for drinks with my husband and friends at night. However, it's hard to find friends to go out with for me. 


Anyway, sorry, I've gone off on a bit of a tangent. 


It all boils down to this: What am I doing with my life and why? I keep asking people's opinions because I value them, but I still don't know what my own opinion is. Have I grown up at all?

bike beats tram

Hi Team! Well, I'm back in trusty Elsendorp, which can be trusted to be totally uneventful. Luckily, you still have a few days of Amsterdam left in my report of the last few days, so please breathe easy.

When I last wrote I was going to do some work on my job application, which I did, after which I met Phizz for some lunch and we drove to Den Haag to pick up his visa for Saudi Arabia. No crazy antics in Den Haag this time. Sometimes we can behave.
Back in Amsterdam, however, we had some time to kill before meeting my cousin and her beau and some friends for a movie at Pluk de Nacht ('Seize the night)', a temporary outdoor cinema which shows free movies. What better to kill time to before watching a movie, then watching a movie, right? So we enjoyed some lovely sushi at Tomo and watched Super 8. It was quite fun, however it does get a bit Disney towards the end. Still, enjoyable, non-the-less.

Then, miraculously it turned into quite a dry and pleasant evening, which resulted in a massive turnout for the Pluk de Nacht movie that night, because up until then it had pretty much rained every single night. Not Friday, however, so we were very lucky. We were not lucky enough to get to have deck chairs which had already all been given out, but we did get a blanket or two. We settled quite comfortably left centre screen, and watched a quite in-your-face and slightly unnerving Australian short film called Crossbow, which prompted me to assure our company that that's not how life is in all Australian suburbs.
After that we watched quite a lovely French film called Les Emotives Anonymes (Romantics Anonymous) which we all thoroughly enjoyed. It was fun watching it with such a bog crowd, people really got into the movie and cheered and sighed at all the good moments. The closing credits rolled to Angus & Julia Stone's song Big Jet Plane (hear it here) which I love and really enjoyed hearing there.

Saturday started very nice and cruisy, another cappuccino or two from Sander at SOK Espresso Lab, who is very pleasant company and we shared a a giggle when a costumer ordered a 'large espresso'. Sander tried to clarify: 'Do you mean a large cappuccino?' ' No, a large espresso, please.' 'A double espresso?' 'No, a laaaaaarrge espresso' combined with a puzzled look, as if that's a normal thing to order. Eventually Sander made him a double espresso, which the customer asked to be turned into a cappuccino after all. Ooookay, then. We should have referred him to the nearest McDonald's. But a customer is a customer, and he got his coffee in the end. Hope he enjoyed it.

Then I met Phizz for lunch at Buffet van Odette, a little gem of a place I was recommended to visit by Sander's colleague when Sverre was in town a few weeks ago. Unfortunately, it's so much of a gem that recently it's been packed to the rafters every time I visit and they seem to be unable to cope with their own popularity. It is fantastic that they are doing so well, but it took over 45 minutes for our lunch to arrive. Luckily I wasn't too hungry and was in brilliant company, we weren't too fussed about the long wait. But there were a few customers who were, understandably. They are moving to a bigger premises soon, but until then I think I will only visit it on weekdays. The lunch was delectable, though, all organic and tasty.

Considering the weather was rather crappy, the afternoon that followed was quite wet and we didn't do too much, I visited one of my favourite little design shops to buy Renée some birthday presents, then picked up my gear from Stella's place and trammed it to Phizz's. We then took a tram back into town to spend the remainder of the wet evening comfortably entertained in the cinema, first we watched Larry Crowne at Pathé City, then we took a taxi to Pathé de Munt. Now, you must know that my dear friend Phizz is a bit of a movie junkie and has a monthly unlimited movie pass. Phizz likes movies. And he likes my company. And I like movies. And I like his company. So, movies together is one of our things. One of many. Another thing we do all the time is say something that the other was just about to say. It's funny and amazing the amount of times we say exactly the same thing. Often the whole conversation is unnecessary because we basically already know what the other is going to say and often it would just be easier to just say 'Ok, good idea' before the other has opened their mouth.
Anyway, so Saturday was movie night, after Larry Crowne we watched Captain America, which was so bad it was funny. And then it was late and bedtime.

Sunday was crazy but fun. I nearly saw all my favourite Dutch people in one day. In the morning I was meeting my cousin and her beau again for coffee at Screaming Beans. Do I still need to write what Screaming Beans is? You're all familiar with that place by now, aren't you? So there we are, the three of us had just ordered coffee when in walks my sister's boyfriend. I said 'Hey, what are you doing here?' And he replied 'I could ask you the same question!' I told him that I was having coffee with my cousin and he told me he was having coffee with my sister. And another friend of hers was there too. So the six of us ended up having coffee together, which was lots of fun. Halfway through I got a text from Emily saying she was having coffee near her place that afternoon and whether I'd like to join her. Of course I did. But I was also going to Utrecht to visit Renée for her birthday. And after I had already agreed to meet Emily I realised I had left Renée's present at Phizz's because I was intending to go back there before going to Utrecht, I wanted to say goodbye to him before he went to Saudi later that day and I would go back to Elsendorp the day after.

So I had to leave coffee early, walk to my sister's where I had left my bike and race to Phizz's to pick up the present and give him a gick hug to say goodbye. That's when my public transport drama started. In hindsight, it would have been better had I just ridden my bike to meet Emily, and taken my bike everywhere that day. But as I didn't know how to ride from Phizz's place to where Emily was, I decided to take the tram. Which I missed by one minute. I ended up being almost half an hour late, but Emily and I still had a nice little chat and some lunch. After which I missed my tram to the train station by one lousy minute, too. So I walked to the train station, where I missed my train by one lousy minute!

I decided I was not going to miss that bus I had to catch in Utrecht, so I raced out of the train to the bus terminal, where I easily caught the bus. I felt quite pleased with myself, until I hopped off the bus and checked out with my public transport chipcard, and noticed it suddenly had a lot less money on it. Then I realised that with my rush to catch the bus, I had forgotten to check out at the train station. Aaaaargh!

However, that didn't wreck any of the fun I had at Renée's that afternoon, I had two types of cake, and plenty of great conversation. In the end I didn't end up leaving until 9.30 and joined one of Renée's friends back to the station. Luckily I found out that when I checked in again at the station, it instead checked me out of the first trip, and thus put all my money back on the card. However, you can't check in again until 15 minutes after checking out, so I missed my train back to Amsterdam! Of course!
All in all still a fabulous way to spend a sunday.

Monday I enjoyed another coffee and some breakfast at Screaming Beans, mostly because the SOK Espresso Lab is closed on Mondays and also because there's no food in Phizz's house so I wanted to eat breakfast, which is very nice at Screaming Beans.

Then I took a train to Almere, where my friend Mel lives, and I spent a lovely afternoon with her, marvelling over the sudden lovely weather and enjoying watching her little boy have water fights out in the court with his friends. Mum came to pick me up on her way to Lelystad, where were would enjoy a dinner at my aunty and uncle's place, and Stella came to join us there too.

It became a very late night, as we left quite late and then had to drop Stella off in Amsterdam, and then drive back to Elsendorp. It was 1 am when I got to bed, but I couldn't sleep until 3 am. I was lying awake worrying about things, and one of those things was the fact that I wasn't sleeping. I really wanted to sleep because I had set Tuesday aside for working on my job application, and I wanted to be bright and sharp for that, as it had to be submitted by Tuesday night. However, I was wiped out all of Tuesday morning, couldn't quite sleep in like I had planned, either and when Mum came home for lunch, I was a useless heap of yawns and sighs. So I had a one hour snooze after lunch, and then an espresso. That worked. I worked on my application all afternoon, and got some great feedback from my sister and Phizz and submitted it feeling happy with it.

And today was a nice a quiet day, though I didn't get to sleep until well after 2 am again last night, despite my best efforts of trying. Don't know what it is, but I'm so tired of it! Literally! Today I am having an early one, for sure. I did some washing today, some shopping, some list-writing, and a lot of thinking. Oh, and of course some blogging!

My way is the Segway.

Due to a lot of fun events and enjoyment of Amsterdam, the following writing has been slightly delayed when it comes to posting. 'Pologies! I started writing it yesterday but the fun began Tuesday night. As you will find out.

So, I’m at Buffet van Odette after just spending a ridiculous amount of time at the S.O.K. Summer Espresso Lab chatting to Sander while drinking two divine cappuccinos. The second was as good as the first and I am now on a total coffee buzz, unable to type fast and accurately ,unable to concentrate or do anything properly! It’s taking me forever to write this, and I’m very amused by my own incapacity. It’s quite funny witnessing my own bumbling. Like a Hugh Grant but younger and femaler.

I have had an amazing day and a half so far. Phizz brought an amount of excitement which was in stark contrast to the week and a half I had spent at home. As is his general effect on life. He decided to swing by Elsendorp and pick me up after he had to drive to Tilburg for work, and I offered him to join us for dinner. However, Mum and I didn’t feel like cooking and we didn’t have much vegetarian food let alone vegan food in the house, so the three of us went to a chinese restaurant nearby where we gorged on a lovely buffet. That’s buh-fay, not boo-fay, by the way. 

Afterwards we drove on to Amsterdam in the small car Phizz had hired, which was absolutely fine, except for the sound system and its inability to be fast and cool. And if there’s anything that we like in a car, it’s listening to tunes (while perhaps doing a little sitting-down-dance) and going fast. And a nice interface. And a smooth drive. And other stuff.

So, Phizz decided he might just see if he could trade it in for something slightly faster/cooler/nicer/with better sound. He could. A car he’s been wanting to try for quite some time, a fast, cool, nice one with a great sound system just happened to be available. So we switched our little biscuit tin in for a bullet. I can say someone was extremely gleeful and contemplating driving to Germany that very minute. And it wasn’t me, though I would have happily gone along with it. But Phizz had to drive to Den Haag the next day to sort out a visa application, so we decided to be sensible. For now.

But, we had agreed on watching a movie, so we drove it just a few kilometers to a secure car park with a car lift (something new for me!) and parked it on the rooftop where we had an awesome view of Amsterdam. We were in very high spirits, and we had chosen the perfect movie for our fun night, a comedy called Horrible Bosses. It was very funny and we came out as cheerful as we went in. Phizz’s hunger to drive somewhere just to drive somewhere had not gone away, so we drove to Haarlem at 12.30 am. We visited my old high school, well, we drove to and around it. It was fun to see my old haunt, and kind of surreal in the middle of the night. Like a bizarre but fun dream.

Still, we weren’t sleepy (we did share a Coca Cola) and not at all sick of driving that nice car. It was late and Phizz had to be in Den Haag the next day, we knew we really should call it a night. But instead we booked a hotel in Den Haag and drove there. Why the hell not? Less traffic at 1 am than at 10 am the next day. The moon was big and low and beautiful. And we felt like we were driving a bubble of happiness through the darkness. There’s something about doing something spontaneous in the middle of the night while everyone’s asleep that makes you feel part of a secret club. 

The hotel bed was big and soft and sooo comfortable when we finally put our heads down at 2.30 am. And the 10 minute drive to the visa place was a breeze. We were out of there in no time. And how to end a pretty much perfect adventure? 


Well, riding Segways on a private tour of Amsterdam, of course. 

We had wanted to ride Segways together since our first meeting in Amsterdam about 4.5 months ago. We had tried that day, but the place was shut and when we called they said they didn't have any tours at all. I had discovered a Segway Tour on Terschelling, an island in Holland’s north which was where we wanted to go on our May road trip, so I thought I’d surprise Phizz and organise that. However, that tour wasn’t done anymore. No Segways on Terschelling or any other northern island. So we ended up riding bikes on Vlieland instead, which was also very awesome. 


But yesterday we were lucky. We called the Segway people in Amsterdam on our way back from Den Haag, but were told there were no tours that day, but that we could book for the day after or Friday. I told them we'd be in touch as we didn't know whether Phizz had to go back to  Den Haag at all in the next few days. Not long after that, however, the Segway people called back and told us we could do a tour that afternoon. And so we did. 


I have to say, I was a little worried about riding a Segway. It looks kind of precarious. But it wasn't, it was easy as pie. And I love pie. It felt really natural, and that's how it's designed as well. I think my experience with snowboarding and dancing helped, too. Catch any bumps in the knees, keep your balance, it's really quite easy. And really quite a lot of fun. Actually, it's a massive amount of fun. As in, I want one! 


We were the only ones on the tour, so it was extra fun, we had a lovely young man called Wolf for a guide, Wolf the Segway Guide. We did a lot of the east part of the city center, where both Phizz and I hadn't really been much to before, so it was also very interesting. I absolutely loved it. And pretty much everyone looks at you and you can see they want to do it, too. Some kid called out 'Look at those cool scooters!' To which our reply was 'It's no Scooter, it's the Future!' 


Unfortunately the weather wasn't fantastic, it was grey and windy and it started drizzling halfway though the tour, but we kept it reasonably dry. After that fantastic afternoon, it was time for a bite to eat and a nice coffee at Screaming Beans. Sadly I was feeling a little unwell, bit queasy and headachy, which might have something to do with not enough sleeping and water drinking, and having too much crazy fun.

But after lots of water and some lunch I felt much better, and I picked up my bike from Phizz's, made my way to Stella's place with a stop for dinner shopping at the supermarket, and then went home (to Stella's place) where I put on some tunes (Cold War Kids, in case you're interested) and happily started creating a nice smoked chicken salad with some baked potato to share with Stella who was joining me for dinner.
Dinner was lovely, it's fun hanging out with Stella, and she joined me to the Amsterdam Dance Center where I was going to do another Lyrical Hip Hop class. She watched for half an hour, and then went on her way. I have to be honest, the hip hop class wasn't nearly as much fun as the first one I had done two weeks ago, because it was different teacher. I much preferred the firs teacher's dance style and way of teaching, this class was a little bit messy and the teacher seemed not very prepared and clear. It was still fun to dance, though, but next time I might do that class again I'm going to call ahead to make sure the other teacher is there. I would love to have one more class from that one, he was great.

After a nice shower I curled up cosily and caught up on some much needed sleep.

Today was very cruisy, slept in a little, nice breakfast by myself: muesli with yoghurt and a strawberry or two (yay for no longer being allergic!) and then I put on some washing and got ready to go the the SOK Summer Espresso Lab for my first milky coffee again in two weeks. Sander, my favourite barista of the SOK team, was there and made me a most beautiful cappuccino. I was so keen to drink it that only after a few sips did I realise it was beautiful moment for a picture, so I took one with my phone. Tada!

Without even thinking about it, I ordered a second cappuccino. I had learned from experience that it's a bad idea to order a second coffee if the first is absolutely divine, because the second one usually disappoints. But not this time. This second one was equally divine. I did end up with that wicked coffee buzz. Totally worth it! I hung out at the Espresso Lab for a quite a while and had a giggle with Sander when a customer ordered a 'Large Espresso' and Sander tried to find out if he wanted either a double espresso, or just a long black, but the request didn't become any clearer. In the end Sander made him a double espresso, but the customer then asked if it could be turned into a cappuccino after all. It was quite funny.

After I spent too much time writing in my little Amsterdam Moleskine journal with pen and pencil at the Lab and Sander got a little busy, I knew I had to do some serious blogging and headed to Buffet van Odette, where it was seriously busy. Good for them. It's a gorgeous little place with delicious organic breakfast and decent coffee (at times). That's where I wrote most of this post. Now you're full circle to the start of this post, but stuff has happened since then!

I met Phizz for a nice lunch of salad at Bijenkorf Kitchen, after which I went home for some washing and some research. I've applied for this job (writer/researcher, or Magnificent Content Creator as the company likes to call it) back in Melbourne, and I got a reply to submit some things, so I have to make sure I do well and impress the hell out of these people. It sounds like a fun company to work for.

Then it was time to head to Emily's for an intimate girls' dinner, some heart to heart chatting, goofy dancing, making up songs to Take That's album Everything Changes, and obviously some giggles. Then Phizz came to join us and we went for a joy ride in his lovely, fast, smooth, beautiful rental ride. We drove to Bloemendaal aan Zee where absolutely nothing was happening, we had to walk quite a bit through bit sandy speed humps and strong wind to get to the one beach club that was open, only to find out there was a door charge of €10, usually it was €20! The place was very quiet and not worth paying to get in, so we just called it a stroll on the beach and headed back to the car and back to Amsterdam.  Emily knew of a cocktail bar on the top floor of the Fashion Hotel, which we decided to try. It was quite a nice bar, though the mood was a bit dead. Lots of men by themselves (on business, probably) and couples with nothing to say to each other. I had to really curb my extrovertiveness, and failed quite poorly. I wanted to be have a loud and outrageous night, but it just wasn't the time or place, Em was tired and Phizz was a little pensive but we did have fun. My cocktail was delicious, it was called Kobe One Kenobe and had Genever, Sake, Lychee, Grape and fresh lime juice. Yum. I had two! I think we were the life of that bar for a little while, and I'm sure we made people wonder what the hell was going on with the three of us, especially when Phizz came to sit in between us. A fairly geeky (but charming!) looking short guy out with two pretty girls? Let them think! Hope they enjoyed their thoughts, I'm guessing it was more exciting for them to imagine what was going on with us than actually being in the company they were in! Next time we go out for cocktails, it will most definitely be back at Vesper or Door 74. This place was trendy looking but not at all lively.

Had a good but short night's sleep, and I just met Stella for a coffee at Screaming Beans who gave me some good advice for my job application. Which I will be spending some time on right now!

Home

It's coming closer and it's not as scary as I thought it would be. I would have been home for almost a month if I had left on my original departure date, and I would have been home for a week if I had left on the 31st of July, which is another date I considered leaving just to keep my silver frequent flying status. But I’m glad I’m going when I’m going.

I’ve been really struggling with accepting that I will have to leave. I’ve been thinking a lot about this split life I lead, and it’s never gotten any easier over the last 11 years. I would have returned to Holland permanently if I had not met my husband in 2004. I was struggling with my studies and then I came for a holiday to sunny Holland and had an awesome time. And I didn’t want to go back to Australia, but I had to finish my studies, so my mum told me to just finish them and then come home. And when I got back to Australia I fell in love. It was amazing, too, that love. Never met such a gentle, warm and caring gentleman before. He wasn’t the type I would usually fall in love with, as I tended to fall for flaky arty types with a lot of ambition and no guts to make their dreams come true. Not this guy, he was full of ambition, but also very committed to making his ambition become his life. And now he’s an associate architect, with a lovely wife (right?), a nice house, a very cool car, a cute Vespa, and a bright future. I am so proud of him, and feel so lucky to be that lovely wife. And I so look forward to going home to him.

But, truth be told, he is the only reason I still live in Australia. I love my family here so much. I love the culture. I love riding my bike through Amsterdam, over the cobbled streets along the canals, dodging traffic like a local, my big chain lock clanging against my handle bars, ringing my bell at the tourists and hearing the Westertoren carillon play. I take deep breaths and feel so very thankful for those moments. My own 15 year-old granny bike to get around, the city becoming a friend, befriending baristas around town, my sister’s place to call my own, and having her and my friends a phone call away - it’s all so amazing. And it feels good to my very bones. This is who I am. But not all of who I am.

I will not linger on how much it pains me to have to leave this house, my mum’s place, a place I call home though I have never really lived here permanently. And to know I will almost definitely not come back to it ever again...well. Brings tears. And also leaving my mother alone, knowing she should take much better care of herself than she does, with her diabetes, and her love for good food. It worries me. It worries me so much. Not to mention her habit of not putting her seatbelt on until she’s already moving. Those things sometimes have me lying awake all night when I’m in Australia. And I have tried to tell her that she needs to look after herself, for me, for my sister, we want her to live a long and healthy life. But she seems hell-bent on living a happy and tasty and comfortable life, even if that means it won’t be that long. There’s nothing I can say to make her choose a long life. 

But I am going back. I want to. I am ready. I look forward to wrapping my arms around my wonderful husband and kiss him. It’s kind of exciting to be able to kiss him again after six months. I look forward to cherishing that. Almost like a real first kiss with the added bonus of knowing it’ll be wonderful. And I look forward to going for breakfast with him on Saturday mornings, like we always do, with the paper, a nice Melbourne coffee, lazy times and total contentment. 

I look forward to cooking in my own big, well equipped kitchen, talking to Ash as he cuts the veggies and tells me about his day, some music playing, darkness falling and knowing this is home. This is my house, my life, my husband, my world and it’s a good one. I do love that life. I find it easy to place it on hold when I’m here, but when I get back I remember how nice my life in Melbourne is. My gorgeous car, so comfortable, so cool, so loveable. My beautiful zippy Vespa, her cream coloured body swift over the (not so busy) Melbourne roads, taking off at the traffic lights with ease, leaving the cars behind me. Pulling of my helmet to see sweet friends in cafes, ready for chats over coffee, to have giggles with my kiddies, perhaps a cool job in writing and/or communication. It’ll all be good. 

I have never left Holland feeling this ready to go home, I don’t think. Maybe in 2009 when Ash and I were in Europe for 3 months because his work kept us in London after our honeymoon. But then I didn’t have him waiting there for me.  We’d been together and that was very nice.  

Notice how I call this home, but also my life in Melbourne? It really is like that. I have two homes. Two worlds, equally wonderful, with their own charms and disadvantages. Life is life, here or there, I only have one life, and I can only be in one place at a time. So I better enjoy the one I am in as long as I can.

Southern Routes/roots

Hi Team! Let me tell you about my lovely weekend. I know it's Tuesday already, but you know, time happens. 

Last time we spoke, or rather, I wrote and you read, was Friday afternoon, unless of course, you read it another time. I'm sure time also happens to you. Regardless, after I wrote I did go for a nice bike ride around Amsterdam, I had a lovely coffee at Two for Joy and ventured further east rather than ride back west like I normally would. I have to say the weather was rather cool and grey, and though I had borrowed a lovely warm cardi from my sister's wardrobe, it was still a bit breezy on the bike, but riding kept me warm enough. I rode along the lovely Amstel river, saw some pretty bridges (no way, in Amsterdam, really??) and ended up as planned at The Botanical Gardens or as they are know in Amsterdam 'Hortus Botanicus' - a name which could be confused with a Harry Potter character. However, considering my financial situation, €7.50 was a bit much to pay to see some plants, so I decided not to visit. Maybe next time I'm in Amsterdam, which will be next week. For now, I am enjoying the sun in Mum's garden which also has lovely plants. And it's free to get in!

I then traveled on to the Nieuwmarkt square area, where I know my sister's new boyfriend lives, and I was curious to see his side of town. I took some random turns, saw some prostitutes, also a lot of tourists eating hot chips in paper cones with dollops of mayo on top, encountered many tourists on bikes riding dangerously and then I decided I would ride on to the Science museum known in Amsterdam as Nemo. If you know your children's fiction you'll know it's not a Harry Potter character, but a Disney character this time. So is Mary Poppins, whom I went to see in a musical last week. She's one of my favourites since I have been Mary Poppins for the last five years, only without the actual magic. That makes me even more of a super nanny, actually. No deliciously flavoured medicine, but cunning additions of honey to make the medicine go down. Works like magic! I know all the songs, too, of course.

By now you'll realise I am fond of children's and young adult fiction, which is appropriate since I studied and wrote a lot of that back at uni. Perhaps one day I will be a young adult book editor, which is my dream job. Or a young adult fiction writer, which is my even dreamier job. Or both!

Sorry, I digress.

I tried to ride to Nemo, but didn't stop enough to check my iPhone maps, so I ended up on the Piet Heinkade, which is on an island-like part of Amsterdam too far north and also where my sister works, but has no access to Nemo. So I rode back and tried again. I got very close, but then I noticed there were no bike paths to Nemo (at least not from where I was) and I was tired and a bit sticky, yet cold, so I decided it was home time. I knew I'd be in Amsterdam again and then I could go and visit Nemo and Hortus and have a cup of tea with them.

Back at my sister's place I relaxed a little, put my poor foot up again, which was improving and not very painful anymore and I decided I would perform my last task of organising for my sister for the week. I emptied out all the drawers of her wardrobe and neatly folded and organised all the clothes in there. It is a relaxing task, and gives such satisfaction. I wouldn't even want to click my fingers like Mary Poppins and do it that way!

The evening I was hoping to catch up with my lovely sister, but she was tired and a bit upset about hearing during her visit to the hospital that afternoon, that her foot hasn't healed properly and she might need complicated surgery and three months in a cast. Ew. Poor thing. So I decided to bum around at home alone, eat some soup she and I made on Monday, lie on the couch with my foot up and watch a few episode of House.

Saturday morning I packed and caught up with my sister for breakfast at Screaming Beans, after which I rode my bike and all my stuff on it to Phizz's place, where I could park my bike safe and dry in his garden. Then we hopped into the nice fast car he hired and drove south to pick up Mum on our way to Limburg, the most southern part of Holland. It's also known as Holland's tail, since it's a longish narrowish part of the country which sticks into Belgium. The drive was smooth as a baby's bottom due to the lovely nice car, however it was so very smooth that it felt like we were going 80 even when went 130, so it seemed tediously slow. Remind me never to buy a nice, expensive, fast, smooth German car. I now understand why people in expensive German cars drive so fast. 

Both my parents were born down south, and lived there for their first 20 years of life or so, and their parents lived there before them, so my family roots are deeply embedded in the lovely clay soil of Limburg. It's a gorgeous part of Holland, amazingly hilly in comparison to the flat, flat pancake that is the rest of the country. The valleys were all cut out of the limestone plateau it was millions of years ago by the rivers that run through there. 

Our first stop was afternoon tea at a gorgeous little castle called Château Elsloo, which, believe it or not, is in a town called Elsloo. I was in dangerous company, namely my most spoil-prone friend Phizz and equally spoil-prone mother. They like their food, they like to order lots of it because they want to taste everything, they love to share it and they want me to enjoy it with them. And let me put the record straight in case you might be confused: I LOOOOOVE food. Really do. But I ain't got no brakes once I get rolling, if you get my drift. If it's in front of me, or even in the house, I shall devour it with joy. But then later, when suddenly my jeans are too tight, I hate that I ate so much of whatever it was I ate. So, when I am with either one of these people, I need to mind the amount of delicious foods that crosses my lips. When it's both of them, it's double trouble. Phizz always tells me to just stop feeling guilty and dig in, but I don't feel guilty about eating food I love. I just know that my genes like to eat, and my jeans don't like that. I want to feel good about my body, and generally I do, but I know when I've gone a bit overboard, and I know that I have since I was in France. Not enough time at the gym (or Hip Hopping!) and too much time enjoying food. It's not balanced. And as a libra, I want balance.

Enough said about that, let's just say I forgot about my jeans last weekend.

 

After this delicious interlude, we drove on though the beautiful countryside towards Valkenburg, which is the most touristy town in Limburg, but we weren't there to visit the actual town, but the cemetery. This is where my grand- and great-grandparents are buried, and also my aunt. I try to visit this very pretty cemetery every time I visit Europe. I enjoy going there, thinking of them, knowing these people are part of the reason I am who I am. This is where my roots are buried.

Then we drove on, past familiar landmarks from my childhood to the little house my grandparents lived together and then when my Opa died, Oma lived there until she passed. They lived there for most of my life, and I have such fond and dear memories of visiting them, staying at the little house and being spoiled with lollies and cakes. 

Afterwards we drove to the Three Country Point, which is the point where Belgium, Holland and Germany meet. There's a monument there, a viewing tower and a lot of touristy restaurants, including of course, lots of tourist. We didn't stop, we just drove past. I don't like the three country point. You know why? Over about fifteen minutes' time I received five messages saying 'welcome to Belgium/Germany' and informing me how much calls and text messages cost from there! Even while I was still in Holland, being so close to the border made my phone think I was in another country. I wouldn't want to live around there, it would drive me crazy! How high would your phone bill be if half the time your phone thinks your in another country when in actual fact you're not?

Anyhow, the drive was just wonderful, I really enjoyed it, seeing all the places I remember from when I was young, knowing the towns, the sights, the streets. We eventually made our way to our hotel in Maastricht, where Phizz and I were staying while Mum would stay with her cousin/my uncle about 20 minutes away. We checked in, had a drink, dropped off our stuff and then went for dinner nearby, after which we dropped Mum off at her cousin's place. We stayed for drinks and a chat and by the time we got to bed it was 1.30 am!

I had plans of walking around downtown Maastricht in the morning while Phizz worked on a report he had to finish before flying to Thailand on Monday, but when I got out of bed I had to rush to make it to breakfast in time! The breakfast buffet was ridiculously extensive, and obviously I ate more than I should have. Hmmm, bacon.

We then went to pick up Mum from my uncle's place and stayed for coffee, apricot pie and some more chatting. I love family. Because I love chatting. I really, really love my family, they are the warmest, loveliest, most welcome bunch of people. I am really going to miss them when I go back to Australia.

Next we planted some flowers at my grand- and great-grandparent's graves, after which we went on to deliver a bat. Yes, a bat. Not a cricket bat, or a baseball bat, but the flying flappy type of bat. Not a real one, mind you, but a toy one.  Here's why:

Last year we had a big family reunion in Limburg, with about 52 descendants from my great-grandfather Van Schaïk. We rented a lovely homestead for the weekend on the top of mount St. Pieter, which is made up out of limestone and has been mined for the last 950 years. Due to this mining, there is an amazing network of tunnels in this mountain and my great-grandfather was very involved with these, he spent 30 years mapping them, studying them, and studying the bats that spend the winter months in the tunnels. He would take the hibernating bats home to study, and hang them in the cellar where my grandmother and her four sisters and one brother would get to study them also. And the only remaining sibling of my grandmother is her youngest sister, my great aunty Frieda, who, it won't surprise you, is very fond of bats. She and her husband came to the family reunion last year, despite them being quite old (85 and 89 at the time) and having to travel all the way from the UK for the reunion. These are the great-uncle and aunty we visited in England for their 65th wedding anniversary a few weeks ago. And they are amazing people.

Anyway, in the homestead there is also a small museum about the Mt. St. Pieter, and the mines and the creatures that live in and around the mountain. Obviously there was a small display on bats, and when my great-aunty Frieda visited the museum she told them about her father bringing them home and also about the toy bat that she has flying in her bookbinding studio. She promised them she would send them one. However, she couldn't find any in the shops, and when she told me this when I was at their place a few weeks ago, I grabbed my great-uncles iPad 2 (yes, my 90 year-old great-uncle has an iPad!), Googled the toy bat, found it on Ebay and ordered it. I had it delivered here to Mum's place and we promised Frieda we would deliver the bat to the museum. And so we did. 

It was well-received there, and they installed it immediately! They were so pleased to have it. Obviously, my aunty Frieda was also very happy to hear I could help her keep her promise, a year afte she made it. We sent her pictures and called her to tell her. Now there's a cute bat with red eyes and flappy wings flying round and round in the museum.

After the bat delivery we went to visit the tunnels themselves, which was fun an interesting. Then, we ate some more delicious food and sadly, it was time to drive back north. 

Phizz dropped us off in Elsendorp and then drove on to Amsterdam to return the car, finish his report and fly to Thailand, while Mum and I went home to do boring mundane things like washing and gardening. And blog writing. Which is not mundane, but fun. Hope you enjoyed it too!